


Sweatpants and Cheesecake

by SailorChibi



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Cheesecake, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Flirting, Flirty Tony Stark, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, OR IS HE, Past Steve Rogers/Sharon Carter - Freeform, Pre-Slash, Supervillain Tony Stark, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Wine, break-up, break-ups are hard, but yeah it's definitely pre-slash, can possibly be read as gen, captain america cannot fight in sweatpants steve, grey tony stark, he's really good at that, it was an amicable ending, jan van dyne is appalled by the idea, really he is just manipulating the system from behind the scenes, spoiler he is not, steve rogers sees thru u tony stark, that left steve a little down in the dumps, tony stark is smitten, tony stark makes them easier, tony stark pretends he is a villain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-09-02 23:41:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16797028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SailorChibi/pseuds/SailorChibi
Summary: Officially, Iron Man is a supervillain and an enemy of the Avengers.Unofficially, Tony is that friend who shows up with wine and cheesecake when you get dumped.





	Sweatpants and Cheesecake

**Author's Note:**

> I participated in the Marvel Trumps Hate auction this year. This fic is for one of my winners, who requested a grey villain Tony and a Steve who just got dumped.

_”And here behind us we can see that the Avengers are finally on scene to deal with the attack. But a couple of key players are missing from the field: I don’t see Agent 13 or Captain America.”_

_“That’s not surprising. I hear Agent 13 has taken a leave of absence from the Avengers, and Captain America is on – good heavens, who is that? Is that –”_

“Oh. My. God.”

Tony sat up straight, pulling his sunglasses off of his head. Beside him, Jan lifted herself up on an elbow and whistled softly. They exchanged a look that spoke volumes before glancing back at the television screen. Honestly, it was a bit like watching a car crash: Tony wasn’t sure whether he wanted to keep watching, but at the same time he found he couldn’t look away. 

On the television screen, the Avenger formerly known as Captain America had just made his appearance in a pair of sweatpants, a ripped hoodie, a dollar store Captain America mask, and sneakers. He didn’t have the shield, but that didn’t stop him from charging the monster attacking the city with a high-pitched shriek. The news camera followed his progress until Captain America had vanished, then swung back around to catch the looks of utter disbelief on Black Widow’s and Hawkeye’s face.

Jan snorted. “Natasha looks like she swallowed a knife.”

“Can you blame her? That is a whole new level of yikes,” Tony said, cocking his head in fascination.

“Oops, here comes Barnes,” Jan said. She and Tony broke out into laughter at the expression on Barnes’s face. It was a look that could only be described as pure, unadulterated horror.

Mercifully for the Avengers, the battle didn’t last very long. Barnes and Widow seemed to be the ones tasked with getting their wayward leader under control. They tag-teamed him, one on either side, and started hustling the captain towards their jet. Amusingly, Captain America was resisting them. He kept gesturing to the news. Finally Widow’s patience snapped and she grabbed his finger, bending it back. Funnily enough, the captain lost all interest in fighting after that.

Frankly, Tony thought, the captain was probably lucky that Widow hadn’t aimed a bit lower. She had a nasty reputation when she got pissed off. 

“Well,” Tony said, sliding his sunglasses back on. “Well, well, _well_.”

“Really?” Jan said, looking at him sideways. “That train wreck? Still?”

“Hey, if those ratty sweatpants don’t hurt that ass, you know it’s gotta be a solid ten.”

“True.” She pursed her lips and tapped her chin thoughtfully. “But you know Cap will never go for it. You’re the enemy.”

“I like to think of myself as more of an impartial observer than a true enemy,” Tony said lightly. It wasn’t his fault that SHIELD hadn’t liked him going after the S.I. weaponry that Stane had sold on the black market. Tony didn’t care what they said; that was _his_ work and he was going to take it back no matter what the cost. If that meant a few terrorists lost their lives in the process, then so be it.

He didn’t actually fight against the Avengers that often. It only happened when Tony ‘teamed up’ with another supervillain to fight against them. Strangely enough, those battles usually ended with the other supervillain’s weapons or ‘bots malfunctioning. Why, just last week Dr. Doom and Tony had teamed up to lay siege against New York. At a pivotal moment, all of Doom’s robots had exploded and left them both without an army. Doom had been shipped back to Latveria, while Tony walked – or rather, flew – away.

This was his city, after all. It would be a pain in the ass if someone like Doom tried to rule it.

Jan rolled over so that she could get some sun on her back. “Think such a subtle difference will really matter to Mr. Black and White?”

“Dunno, but it’s worth a shot,” Tony said. 

“You and your Captain America crush,” she said fondly, and he grinned back at her.

“I think I’ll pay our illustrious captain a visit.” He got up, reaching for a towel and wrapping it around his waist. Pepper always got mad at him when he walked through the tower naked.

Jan slapped his ass without looking and said, “Good luck. Burn those goddamn sweatpants.”

“Thanks Babe.” Tony ambled into the tower, whistling under his breath, and headed straight for the shower. He’d need to look good if he was going to see Steve.

He took his time in the bathroom, showering and shaving and styling his hair, then emerged in a cloud of steam to examine his closet. He finally selected a dark grey suit that fit him like a glove, paired with a white dress shirt, a crimson tie and black shoes. It was one of his favorite outfits, a Jan van Dyne original, and made him look like a million dollars. He’d need that confidence boost today.

That done, Tony took the stealth version of the suit for a drive and made his way to the apartment of one Steve Rogers. It was an old, tiny little thing above a pizza joint in Brooklyn. The whole apartment always smelled like a combination of cheese and pepperoni. This time, it also smelled like sweaty socks and old food. Tony wrinkled his nose and pointedly left the window open to get some fresh air.

All of New York had been horrified when news came that Agent 13 and Captain America had broken up. They were the sweethearts of the Avengers, frequently the face of the team’s publicity and a popular celebrity couple. Rumor had it that Agent 13, Sharon Carter, had been the one to break it off. Tony thought there was probably a lot of truth to that. Whatever problems there was with the relationship, Steve had been determined to plow through and make things work. 

At the very least, Carter had been the one who’d chosen to step back from the Avengers. Tony had tracked her progress across the country; she’d ended up at a SHIELD outpost in California, where she seemed to be flourishing. The same couldn’t be said for her ex, considering today’s display. It was true that Captain America could fight in just about anything, but dirty, ripped sweats was pushing it.

Tony took a seat on the couch and waited.

Some three hours later, he heard cursing and scrabbling at the door, followed by the jangle of keys. It took at least four minutes – he counted – before the door was kicked open and Steve stormed in. He was so off his game that he didn’t even notice Tony at first, throwing his bag at the far wall and then turning to slam the door shut. It bounced off the hinges and nearly nailed Steve in the face. Steve made a snarling sound and slammed it a second time.

“Bravo,” Tony said, deciding to intervene if only for the sake of Steve’s furniture.

Steve startled, squinted at him, and groaned. “Look, I’ve just come from a two hour lecture from Fury, Coulson and Natasha. If you’re here to lecture me too, please save it.”

“I don’t do lectures, Darling,” Tony reprimanded gently. “I do wine.”

“Wine,” Steve repeated dumbly, looking at the coffee table, where a bottle of wine, two glasses, and a box sat, in silent disbelief.

“Wine,” Tony confirmed. “And cheesecake, but only because Wasp continues to be a terrible influence.” He patted the couch beside him. “Come here. Let’s talk about that frankly appalling display.”

“I literally just said I don’t want to talk about it,” Steve snapped. “I got the job done, didn’t I? Who cares whether I had the shield?”

“I don’t. I just want to know where those dreadful sweatpants are so that I can burn them.”

Steve looked at him. Tony looked back calmly, searching Steve’s face. And there it was, a tiny hint of a smile that finally, reluctantly, bloomed into a full smile. Steve sighed, his shoulders slumping, and moved over to the couch. He sank down beside Tony and put his head in his hands. Tony took that as his cue to crack open the wine bottle and pour them both a glass.

“You don’t have to burn my sweatpants,” Steve said at last, sipping at the wine. He paused, swishing the wine around inside of his mouth, and then relaxed. Tony gave him an indulgent look; after all this time, Steve still thought that Tony didn’t know him well enough to pick out a wine Steve would like? How adorable.

“Oh, I really do. If I don’t, you’re getting a personal visit from Wasp.”

“Okay, no, burn them,” Steve said immediately. “I can’t bear another shopping trip.”

Tony hid his smile with his glass. “Who knew that the great Captain America could be taken down by threat of a shopping trip?”

“People who have never been forced to shop with you and Wasp,” Steve deadpanned, knocking back the rest of his wine. Since Steve was obviously having a rough few days, Tony forewent the lecture about how wine was to be slowly enjoyed and just refilled Steve’s glass. Then he took the box off the table.

“She and I are a goddamn gift and you know it,” Tony said, lifting the lid of the box. They both looked down at the contents, which looked pretty spectacular if Tony did say so himself. Bruce was a heck of a baker, and these half dozen mini cheesecakes could’ve come straight off the shelves of the most expensive bakery in New York. Two caramel, which were Tony’s favorite, and four chocolate, because nothing was better for a broken heart than three kinds of chocolate and cream cheese.

Steve’s face softened suddenly. “You really are.” The way he looked at Tony made Tony’s stomach do flip flops, and Tony hastily preoccupied himself with grabbing two forks off the coffee table.

“Yeah, well, you better enjoy them because I had to fight Pepper for these and that woman plays dirty,” said Tony, handing Steve one of the forks. He picked up his glass again and took a swig of wine. The cool taste helped to settle his nerves, which was annoying only because he shouldn’t have had any nerves. He was Tony Stark! Iron Man! A super villain!

“I’d believe it. You ever set Pepper loose, the Avengers are fucked,” Steve said absently, spearing a corner of the chocolate cheesecake closest to him.

“I’m pretty sure the only reason Pepper hasn’t taken over the world is because of how much work it would be,” Tony admitted, and Steve cracked another grin.

“It would be nice. Then I wouldn’t have to worry about super villains,” Steve said.

“I’d still be around,” Tony said.

Steve just looked at him with that same tender expression. “Yeah, I know.”

“Wha – hey! I am totally a super villain! Three weeks ago I teamed up with the Green Goblin!”

“To stop the Goblin from hurting Spider-Man,” Steve pointed out.

Shoot. Tony hadn’t known that Steve had figured that one out. “Doesn’t matter. I still teamed up with him.”

“Tony.” Steve sighed, leaning back. “When are you going to give up this super villain thing and become an Avenger?”

“Never gonna happen,” Tony said tightly. That file that Black Widow had written about him still rankled. Iron Man yes, Tony Stark not recommended. Well, that was just fine. Fury would reap what he sowed. If SHIELD didn’t want to listen to Tony when he warned them about the world, then Tony would take matters into his own two hands. He’d never played by the rules before and he wasn’t about to start now just for a pair of blue eyes.

“You could think about it,” Steve said.

“I said no,” Tony snapped, moving to stand. A big hand settled onto his knee, stopping him. He slowly ran his eyes up Steve’s arm, to Steve’s shoulder, to Steve’s jaw, before finally settling onto Steve’s eyes. There was something almost timid about the way Steve was looking at him.

“Please don’t go. I’m sorry. This is the most normal I’ve felt since Sharon left,” said Steve.

Tony frowned, but he’d never been able to deny Steve anything and they both knew it. He sank back into his chair and finally stuck his fork into the caramel cheesecake. He lifted a forkful to his lips, but the smooth, creamy taste wasn’t as enjoyable as it usually was. He was beginning to think that he shouldn’t have come. It was kind of ridiculous, Iron Man sitting here with Captain America.

“What happened?” he asked finally.

“That’s the million dollar question, isn’t it?” Steve emptied his glass again. “I can’t say I thought things were going well. I guess I knew that they weren’t. But I didn’t think it was that bad.”

Despite filling Steve’s glass for a third time, Tony remained quiet. He’d been young when he learned the value of a pointed silence, particularly in the business world. It was often much easier to get people talking if they felt the need to fill the silence; sure enough, after a moment, Steve began talking again.

“We were just going through the motions, I think. There was no excitement. No desire. We woke up in bed together, got dressed, went to work. Came home, had dinner, fucked, and went to sleep. Sharon said she wanted more.” Rather than drinking his wine, Steve swirled the contents of his glass. “I can’t blame her for that, but it hurts. The apartment feels so empty. I didn’t even get out of bed yesterday.”

“That explains the sweats,” Tony mused, feeling a pang of sympathy. Break-ups were hard. He’d practically lived on Rhodey’s couch after Rhodey broke up with Carol. And it didn’t seem like Steve had anyone to lean on. For all that SHIELD spun the Avengers like a family, they were really more like distant work colleagues.

Steve smiled wryly. “Yeah. Obviously not my best decision. Coulson asked me why I couldn’t find a clean pair, or at least ones that weren’t ripped. I didn’t have the heart to tell him Sharon got the sewing kit.”

“Oh, Darling,” Tony said, torn between amusement and horror. He sipped his wine to hide both reactions, but still caught a smug glint in Steve’s eyes. Steve seemed to take far too much pride in provoking a reaction out of Tony.

“It won’t happen again,” Steve went on. “It’s like Coulson said. Everyone gets dumped. I have to learn to deal with it like a big boy rather than, quote, moping around like a teenager who just got dumped before prom, end quote.”

“Coulson’s sympathy is overwhelming,” Tony muttered into his glass. 

“You showed up here to burn my sweatpants. I’m not sure you have a leg to stand on, Tony.”

Slightly insulted, Tony drew himself up. “I can lend a sympathetic ear and burn your sweatpants at the same time. I brought wine. I brought _Bruce’s cheesecake_.”

“So you did,” Steve said fondly. He leaned forward and rested a hand on Tony’s arm. “Thank you. It means a lot to have a friend check up on me,” he went on, looking at Tony with those too blue eyes and an earnest smile that made Tony’s heart do some serious acrobatics.

Tony blinked and gulped down the rest of his wine and thought, oh shit. He was _so fucked_.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [tumblr](http://tsuki-chibi.tumblr.com/).


End file.
